Campaign Story

We are Drew and Jessey Idler, and welcome to the most vulnerable chapter of our story. We met in 2021 on the Jiujitsu mats, started dating in 2023, and got married and began our fertility journey in 2024. We’ve had quite great adventures in our lives and careers thus far – I’ve been a records specialist at a local police department for the last 5 years and Drew has been a control panel technician for over 20 years since completing his time in the Air Force. What we’ve always dreamed of becoming, though, is parents. Since we are on the older side of the fertility world (I’m 35 and he’s 44), we started doing some tests early on to get a baseline. We found that the cards were stacked against us both with male factor infertility of azoospermia and a lower AMH on my end.

After further tests and an aspiration procedure for Drew, we were elated when we were told that we wouldn’t have to seek a sperm donor. The doctors were able to extract enough for 5-6 rounds of IVF, but they confirmed there are some internal pathways that can’t be fixed. His procedures were done, now came the work for the next steps.

Summer 2025 was spent figuring out the grueling process of financing. Our insurance plan at that time didn’t cover fertility treatments and we weren’t selected for a grant I had applied for, so we had to seek a loan. Once we finally made it through that process, we started our first round of IVF with Seattle Reproductive Medicine (now Pinnacle Fertility) around the holidays. We had the added challenge of having to drive almost 4 hours to Seattle for ultrasounds and blood draws as we didn’t have a clinic in our area yet. Our first egg retrieval resulted in 3 eggs, 2 mature and successfully fertilized. None of our embryos made it.

Round 2 came after the new year. I went back onto the insurance plan at my job since there was some fertility coverage. We were able to use the remainder of our payment from the first round to get us through round 2, but still had to scramble to pay cash for all the medications which would have been 3x the amount going through insurance.

The second egg retrieval resulted in 11 eggs: 7 mature, 6 successfully fertilized. We had 2 promising embryos and I elected for both to be transferred if possible (twins has always been a dream of mine). Everything showed they were holding on and the numbers were looking promising. When we went in for our first ultrasound at 7 weeks, they didn’t see any babies, but they saw a mass where it shouldn’t be. Our babies were ectopic and they sent us directly to the ER. After surgery, we were informed my fallopian tube had ruptured and the still-growing mass settled against my fallopian tube, ovary, pelvic wall, uterus, and colon. It was successfully removed along with my fallopian tube and then we were further hit with the devastation that our babies were gone.

As we grieve and recover, we’re still trying to figure out what’s next, whether that be another full medicated round of IVF or pursuing an egg donor. We don’t want to give up on this dream but are needing to think outside the box to give it all we’ve got. It takes a village to raise a family, and that village for us has truly been built in this fertility struggle. We couldn’t have made it this far without the love and support of our family, friends, and others who have been in the thick of their own battles. It’s comforting to know we are not alone in this, but also heartbreaking knowing how many are in the same fight for this dream.

Any donations we receive will help us into our next round and supplement what insurance doesn’t cover for IVF, egg donor, and medications.

Thank you for giving our family a chance!

Jessey & Drew